Words by which to live your life. x

Sun, 12 May 2013 07:14:50 -0400

My beautiful boyfriend and Bobby Roger. x

Sun, 12 May 2013 07:13:00 -0400

My beautiful boyfriend and Bobby Roger. x

Sun, 12 May 2013 03:05:00 -0400

When I was a child,

My innocence was physically violated, once or twice.

But it was exploratory,

And it did not hurt me as much

As the lies, the dependency, the isolation, the intensity, the love that followed.

How could you love me

When my entire being was contingent on you?

Making you happy,

Making you loved,

Making sure you were okay.

How could you know me

When my entire self revolved around you?

Listening to you,

Giving you advice,

Being terrified of upsetting you or saying the wrong thing.

And now that I am older,

And wiser

I have refused to do or be any of those things for you;

And now

You don’t love me,

You don’t even hate me -

You just don’t think of me,

Or the things you did

When I was 5,

When I was 9,

When I was 13,

And I trusted you.

Do you even remember?

Do you even know that it was wrong?

Even today I still fight with myself, as the urge to protect you is too strong.

Even when what I am protecting you from

Is just me,

And the truth of who you are.